Breaking: Deuce Tatum Attacks Defensive Player Of The Year

or

Is It True You Love Like Diving On A Loose Ball?

The reporter opens the press conference

by asking

Did you feel it?

 

Marcus Smart smirks, says

He’s always trying

to attack me.

 

The room laughs.

 

We have a love/hate relationship.

 

I laugh.

 

Is it true love

is like that?

 

Sometimes when I'm alone

I hold a press conference

for myself.

 

I ask the hard hitting questions

that come before words.

 

And sometimes

the room laughs too

 

 

GREATNESS IS A FREAK

I’ve been thinking lately

(first mistake)

in evolutionary terms

about everything.

 

I've come to the conclusion

that we’re a little

fucked up.

 

I stopped shampooing

because cavemen.

 

I started eating meat again

because it feels

incredible.

 

Apparently Lebron James

spends a million bucks a year

on his body alone.

 

One day you’ll be amazed

what I accomplished

with so little

 

 

Lay Up

This shit is easy

 

Just pick a word

 

then another

 

until you want to stop

 

The illusion is

 

of course

 

the stopping